Thoughts from March 2020

Hello! Happy Spring! It's been a long time, hasn't it? Another couple of months since my last post. Apologies. I'm currently working on one reflecting on the past year, and while I hope to have that done asap, I just scrolled down to look at the posts I made last year (so that I don't reuse photos) and found one written just before the first lockdown, which I hadn't published. I guess I considered it unfinished and/or uninteresting. Overthinking as usual. But now it seems fine to me, it'll do; I haven't changed a word. It's interesting to see what I was thinking about then and where I am now. I guess it's basically a journal entry, a letter to nobody in particular. So here you go, some of my thoughts from early March 2020...

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It's a mild and dry Saturday afternoon and the country has not yet gone into lockdown over Coronavirus, but I'm sat indoors in my pyjamas... probably not the best thing, perhaps I should be making the most of the freedom of movement and go to the cinema or the shops or something, but it's what I feel like doing right now. It's been a tiring week.

My depression has returned over the last few months, making me realise I need to change my way of life and not just get another job, otherwise it's just going to go in circles. I read a book last year - The Lost Connections, by Johann Hari - that explained how depression is largely caused by disconnection from a number of important things including meaningful work, other people, the natural world, meaningful values, and a hopeful and secure future. It really made sense to me and rang true for my life, and I need to do more to better my connections with those things.

I was made redundant from my job a couple of weeks ago. It's a small company which hasn't been doing well recently and needed to cut costs, and I wasn't surprised - in the year I was there, it was always very quiet and I had very little work to do, particularly in the last few months. So I actually saw it as a positive, and decided to take the opportunity to do something interesting and live my life a bit. Instead of looking for another full-time permanent office job, I'm going to do temp work until August when the tenancy on the flat ends, then leave Southampton and go help out on farms for a while :) I'm desperate to connect to nature more; to wake up and hear birdsong, to look out the window and see trees and grass and flowers and other plants, to learn how to grow herbs and vegetables and fruit and preserve produce for storage, to learn about horticulture and ecology and permaculture and regenerative agriculture and more - and to meet other people who are into all that too, like-minded souls.

I've just completed my first week of temp work, at a florist relay company which takes orders from around the world and finds a UK florist to make and deliver it locally, like Interflora but not. Mother's Day is one of their busiest times of year so they needed a few people to come in just for two weeks to help out with the extra workload. Unfortunately, my autistic self has not been able to get my head around the processes at all, and I've emailed the temp agency to let them know I don't feel able to go back next week because of that. Part of me feels bad, especially because for some reason I was the only one of the three temps to stay beyond the first two days, but if I can't do something I can't do it, I would be of zero use to them, and I don't want to stress myself out any longer unnecessarily. It would have paid enough to cover a month's rent so it's a shame I'll only be getting half of that, but my old job will be paying me this month as a sort of redundancy compensation, so thankfully April's rent and bills will be covered.

Although leaving home at 6:55 each morning in order to start work at 8:30 wasn't lovely, getting to explore Romsey a bit was nice. I've never been there before, despite it being so close to where I've spent most of my life. It's a lovely little town! My lunchtime walks were spent moseying down quiet residential streets lined with pretty houses, trees, and gardens full of flowers and birdsong, and sitting in the Abbey grounds (although it was cold!). The Abbey itself is beautiful, and was a wonderful much-needed oasis of calm and peace. I'm not religious but love churches. There's something strangely comforting, familiar, and grounding about walking around supermarkets, too. Especially if it's first thing in the morning and it's only just opened and the other customers are mostly pensioners.

I'd like to read more. As much I love books, I don't actually do much reading anymore, I used to read every day and haven't done that in a long time. My sister was recently shocked when I said I've never read a Roald Dahl book. There's a lot I haven't read, and I'd like to change that. I saw a nice post on Facebook this morning which made me smile, listing places you can go even if you're on lockdown: Narnia, Middle-earth, Hogwarts, Asgard, a galaxy far far away, Earthsea, Lansquenet-sous-Tannes... :D The choices are endless, and that's just fiction. While this coronavirus pandemic is not a good thing, maybe it'll be an opportunity do more reading.

One of spring's simple pleasures - lovely daffodils

Science behind the health benefits of nature

It feels a bit weird to be making a post just before Christmas / around the winter solstice, and for it to be a topic I could post at any other time of year. I feel like I should be writing about the symbolism of the solstice, and how it's a time to rest and reflect and face the darkness and wait for the light to return. I even feel, with all the rubbish news around and people struggling so much at the moment, that perhaps I shouldn't post anything at all. But I haven't planned anything like the former, got this written pretty quickly for a change and would like to publish it, and, well, perhaps this little post will help someone, be a small pleasant distraction or an encouragement to get out for a walk or something.

I'm sure everyone reading this is at least vaguely aware that being outside in nature is good for us. It boosts our mood, reduces stress, improves ability to focus, etc. What's less understood is why that is. Well, research is beginning to tell us! I've long been interested in science, and more recently in how the brain works, and when in a recent college Group Tutorial session we were asked to create a short presentation on a topic we were interested in (but that was at least vaguely related to the course), this sprung to mind. And I thought it'd be a nice blog post, too.

Back in the spring lockdown, every morning I tuned into the Facebook Live 'Self-Isolating Bird Club' broadcasts by Chris Packham and his zoologist step-daughter Megan McCubbin. A guest they had on a few times was Emma Mitchell, a nature-lover with chronic depression who trained as a biologist. She's fascinated by how nature makes us feel better, and shared some of the science behind it. The research is all fairly recent, scientists are only just beginning to understand and there's a lot more we don't know the mechanisms behind yet. But it's so interesting. So... 

Exposure to green spaces, plants, and water does lots of things:

• boosts the immune system
• lowers heart rate and blood pressure
• reduces stress
• improves mood
• increases ability to focus
• accelerates recovery from surgery or illness
• increases energy level
• improves sleep

I'll start with phytoncides. In layman's terms - plant oils. They are airborne chemicals released by plants to fend off pests and disease, and will just be floating around in the air around you whenever you're within a couple of feet of some plants. When humans breathe in phytoncides, two things happen:

• heart rate and blood pressure lower
• cortisol (stress hormone) reduces

So we feel slightly more positive when we're among plants. Even indoor plants can make a difference, they still give off those oils. Herbs are actually great for this - rub them between your fingertips and inhale the glorious scent. You'll get a hit of phytoncides, and a hit of dopamine (a feel-good hormone) from enjoying the scent. Anxiety also reduces when we're around plants.

Phytoncides also have an effect on our immune system. Our bodies respond to them by increasing production of 'natural killer cells' - a type of white blood cell which helps kill off cells infected with viruses or tumors. 

And it's not just plants on land; chemicals given off by marine life have been shown to help reduce allergies and asthma.

Now onto the soil. Soil contains a type of beneficial bacteria, which activates groups of neurons (nerve cells in the brain) responsible for producing serotonin. Serotonin is a hormone which helps us feel good. Low levels of it contribute to depression. The bacteria also activates neurons related to our immune response. So if you're digging in the garden or topping up the soil in a plant pot, rub your hands in that good clean dirt, bring them to your nose, and breathe in deep! I'll leave it to your judgement about doing that when outdoors elsewhere, haha.

Water! Even sitting by an urban fountain for a while can be beneficial, if you can't get to a stream, lake, or the sea. As with phytoncides, water has a few effects. The sound of water reduces cortisol levels. Seeing water dials down our fight-or-flight response, calms us down a bit. And looking at water, where there's very little going on, gives our brain a little break from the almost-constant visual stimulation we are subjected to and surrounded by in our modern lives. There's also something called the Mammalian Dive Reflex, which among other things means that when our faces are submerged in cold water and we're holding our breath, our heart rate slows. So next time you're feeling a bit worked up, maybe fill your bathroom basin with cold water, take a deep breath, and plunge your face into it for as long as you can. Even if you're in a public bathroom, you could still probably benefit from holding your breath and splashing cold water on your face a few times.

A few last points:

• the colour green makes us feel more positive
• patterns in nature (symmetry, spirals, fractals, waves, etc.) - our brains are drawn to these and react positively to them
• natural sounds, especially birdsong, has been shown to be more relaxing than meditation apps (check out the RSPB Birdsong Radio!)
• seeing, hearing, watching wildlife gives us a spark of joy - and a hit of dopamine

So. As in all aspects of life, even the little things can make a difference. Getting out into green spaces - even just a city park - is so important. If you have any outdoor space, put some potted plants in there. If you don't, then get some houseplants, or windowsill herbs. Have photos of trees and landscapes and water you can look at. Go for walks. Sit by a fountain. Listen to birdsong. Rub your hands in the soil and let it run through your fingers. Go wild swimming. Look up and around and take notice, see the patterns and symmetry and the strong little plants pushing through the cracks in the paving stones. If you have a garden, have a go at making some of it wildlife-friendly by bringing in native species of plants - that'll increase your chances of seeing wildlife and therefore of a little dopamine. Nature can be a real healer. Don't underestimate the power of seemingly small, simple things.